Monday, 21 of April of 2014

Tag » bondage

POTW: Bottle Baby Girl

Penny is force fed from a pink baby bottle.

2:9


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POTW: Adult Baby Girl in Bondage

Penny is bound and gagged with a pacifier gag in a crib. She’s wearing an adult baby outfit and a thick diaper.

2:2


POTW: Panty Gag and Diaper

Penny wears a diaper and a panty gag while tied down to a massage table.

1:5


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The R Word

I had a shoot with SexuallyBroken.com yesterday that was cut short. (I was just off my game that day for some reason. They treated me with a level of professionalism and respect that I wish was more common in the adult industry and I’m anxiously looking forward to finishing the shoot with them. Matt Williams is he kind of dom you hope for and their talent manager and other staff displayed a humanitarian concern that was moving and helpful.) During the initial interview, Matt Williams, the director and my co-star, asked a lot of his questions that were difficult to answer on the spot because they were things that I was not sure that I could say on camera. For example, when he asked how old I was when I began engaging in BDSM, the truth is that I was in elementary school. However, I can’t say that on camera, so I vaguely answered, “Before I was legal.”

Then he asked, “What do you like during sex?”

“I like to be bound. I like to feel like I don’t have a choice… I like… I’m not allowed to use the R word, am I?”

Matt’s brow knitted. “The R word?”

A camera girl to his left, quietly but anxiously, said no.

Matt was still confused. “What’s the R word?”

The camera girl, again low and quick, answered, “Rape.”

“Oh, god! No, you can’t say that!”

I gave a sheepish smile and continued, “Well, I like to be held down and having the guy–sometimes a woman, but usually a guy–say, over and over, ‘I’m going to R you. I am R-ing you.’”

We finished the interview and got on with the shoot, which, again, was unfortunately but with professionalism and caring, cut short.

After I got home I spent some time with my children, then dropped them off with their father. I got home and cleaned most of the apartment and took a bath and put on a cute satin teddy from Secrets in Lace and a pink satin robe. I put on some turquoise earrings, my boyfriend’s birthstone, and started to clean my room.

The doorbell rang. This was a little odd, because my boyfriend has a key and usually just lets himself in. I went to the door and it was him. He had just gotten off work, but had changed into jeans, a white t-shirt, and a black jacket. He had a bulging backpack over his shoulder, which I assumed held his clothes.

I let him in and we stood in the doorway kissing for a while, whispering to each other.

“Did my baby girl miss me?”

“Yes, Daddy. Please touch me.”

“I love you.”

“Are you hungry? I could make something.”

“Let’s go to the bedroom.”

We walked to my room. He was behind me and usually when he is, he’s caressing me and stroking me, but this time he wasn’t. We got to my room and I got up on the bed. When I turned around, his backpack and jacket were off and he was holding a fistful of rope and, well, this:

fembot-bracelet

It’s a custom “slap bracelet” that my boyfriend had made ages ago. The idea is that, if he can get it on me, I have to do whatever I’m told. It’s a way of “activating” me. I had it in my jewelry armoire and had told him where it was, but didn’t know that he had actually gone in and found it. For all I know, he took it out ages ago.

He held the bracelet in his fingertips and swung it from side to side. I got into a defensive position. He lunged.

From there we played for maybe three hours. We wrestled. He bound me, I escaped. He entered me while the bracelet was on, then took it off to watch me struggle. He put it on my ankles and wrists–wherever it would go. Once, when he was moving me, it came off and I almost got away. I held it in my hand and refused to let go, even when he twisted my arms and dug his fingers into my pressure points. We got so sweaty that twice we had to take breaks to go shower. (Sex is my favorite workout!)

At one point, the bracelet was off and he was trying to get it on me, but I was blocking him successfully. Instead of being confrontational, I began to plead with him. “Kiss me. Please kiss me so that I can kiss you back.” I wrapped my legs around his waist and pulled him close. “Not like this. Make love to me. Please. Don’t you want to hold me?” I let my voice shake and tried to looks as, well, pitiful as possible. I thought he was going to crack. He was still struggling to get the bracelet on me, but not as hard. He was avoiding meeting my gaze and swallowed hard, as if he was restraining himself. But he didn’t crack–and he eventually got the bracelet back on.

After that, I bound his wrists and gagged him, got him in some holds and punched him in the back good and hard. I really like to watch men struggle while in bondage and punching can feel very satisfying.

However, he managed to turn the tables. I had bound his wrists in front of him because I was showing him how to do a certain tie. Big mistake. He got his arms around me so that he was hugging my neck. He pushed his mouth to mine and kissed me hard. I tried to bite him, but he just kissed me harder until I was overwhelmed.

Then he growled in my ear, “Take my cock out.”

I refused, but he squeezed my neck until I did. I reached down and drew his hard cock out of his boxers. He immediately plunged it into me. I moaned and tried to buck, but his weight was holding me down. As he took me, he told me how this was inevitable, how he would always win, how much stronger he was. He fucked me until I came, then we lay in each others’ arms until he wanted me again, then he fucked me until we came together as I screamed, “This is what I want from you; give me your cum.”

Those three hours were some of the best sex I’ve ever had and they were very R word role play heavy.

I don’t understand why the R word can’t be used in porn. Rape ROLE PLAY is about being FREE. Actual rape is the hard opposite of that. If a porn company uses pre- and post-shoot interviews and negotiates with models and has a policy of stopping shoots that go wrong, I see no reason why this common female fantasy can’t be indulged.

I have been sexually assaulted three times. Once when I was thirteen, and twice by my ex-husband when I was twenty-six. I will not go into details because they were all pretty horrible instances that undermined my belief in the justice system to the point that I think cops should be abolished. The only help I got was from other adult industry people and if, god forbid, something should ever happen to me or someone I know again, I will not waste time going to the cops. I don’t believe in vigilante justice, but I do believe in outing rapists and doxxing. I just wanted to make my stance on that clear. I also want to make it clear that my interested in rape role play survived my assaults and did not result from them. And, as an interesting point, I have absolutely no fantasies about street harassment/catcalling. That’s just annoying and makes the perpetrator seem weak and kinda stupid.

So while I’m not about to fight for my “right” to use the R word in porn, it’s only because I think there are many things that are more important. Like, probably literally everything. Like, finding that Lego block I lost yesterday is more important. I just wanted to share a little about what I like, in case you were wondering. I also imagine that my average reader is a male who has not experienced sexual assault, but knows and loves women who have. I know it was hard for Manny and me to start having sex again after the last and most violent instance of assault that my ex-husband committed, but we got through it and now enjoy a happy role play life again.


Mommy and Daddy on TheUpperFloor.com

I had my second shoot as a house slave for TheUpperFloor.com last night and it may have gone a little…age play.

I got there early because I’d been at Maker Faire all day and was pretty sure that I was gonna need a shower first. I smelled like sunscreen and sweat. Not sexy. I was also kind of nervous because it was my third day in a row shooting and Izamar Gutierrez and Stephanos had just destroyed my ass and pussy, respectively. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do. Of course I could just, you know, not have sex, but who likes that?

I knew that I would be working with Simone Sonay, whom I had briefly met several times at KinkLive.com. And when I say briefly, I mean briefly. Like: “Hi! I like your shoes!” “Oh, thanks!” “Bye!” “Later!” Still, she was gorgeous and very friendly, and everyone said wonderful things about her. She had a strong “big sister” vibe that I find incredibly appealing and I was excited and nervous to work with her.

I got to the Armory and showered and did my make up when I saw the male talent that I was going to be working with. It was Bill Bailey and I hadn’t found any pictures of him online and was worried that I was going to be disappointed. I was not. He had the rock hard body that I’m not super into, but he did look very strong and had a scar down his stomach. (Chicks DO dig scars!) He also had a blond Mohawk. I have been pestering Manny to get a Mohawk for AGES and he always says no. On top of all that, he had a gorgeous Southern accent. As Simone said, “Does my pussy detect an accent?”*

So, I was all ready, but Bill and Simone still needed to prepare. Simone was doing her makeup while Bill was trying on his wardrobe. I was sitting on the floor, cross-legged, when I got my first hint of it: This is like watching Mommy and Daddy get ready to go out. They were sort of talking to me, but mostly over my head. I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to be weird.

I went into the event first. I was supposed to chat with the members, but there were technical difficulties where we couldn’t log in to see what the members were saying, so I had to sort of do The Penny Show, which obviously I LOVE doing. I gave myself a warm up with the cane, poured lube all over myself, put clothes pins on myself, invited an attendee to cane me and pull the clothes pins off of me, and just sort of ran all over the place being naughty.

By the time Simone and Bill came in and started fucking, I was on a table being spanked by, well, everyone. (I regret nothing!) I was beginning to be worried that Bill just wasn’t into me. He hadn’t tried to pull me aside, hadn’t tried to chat with me, hadn’t asked to touch me. When I was in the green room talking with Alani Pi earlier, he just sort of wandered off. Usually I feel like a little princess when I work with men, but Bill was like the cool jock who wouldn’t give me the time of day. I had tried flirting with him a little and done that thing where I let my robe fall open to let him see my breasts (Everyone loves my breasts!), but nothing was working. That said, I did catch him glancing at me a few times when he thought I wasn’t looking. I suspect he may have just been toying with me.

I got spanked pretty hard before James Mogul decided to gag and bind me in a crawling position with mitts–the only was I was unlikely to misbehave, though I’m confident that I could still have found a way. Then I was told that I could crawl over to Bill and Simone–while Mr. Mogul whipped me with a singletail–and service Simone while she serviced Bill. Of course, I still had the ball gag in.

I admit that this part was more frustrating than fun. I couldn’t really lick her. Bill asked what she tasted like. I helplessly motioned to the gag. He laughed and went back to what he was doing. I pawed at it with my mitts and looked up at him imploringly, but he just stuck my face back in her ass. Finally, after I don’t know how many agonizing minutes of being able to see and smell her, but not really touch or taste her at all, Mr. Mogul removed all my bondage and allowed me to service Simone properly.

From there it just devolved into a fuck fest. (Is “fuck fest” one word? Fuckfest. Fuck-fest. Hmm.) Bill was an amazing lover. When we had anal, he worked me up nice and slow, fingering me, but keeping me tight at the same time, teasing me and talking to me. Simone was AMAZING. She talked me through deep throating and taking Bill’s huge cock in my ass. She was attentive and kinky. It was really, REALLY good. I haven’t had sex like that in ages. I was overwhelmed.

I was so overwhelmed that I asked Simone something kind of dirty. She was just so authoritative and guiding, I couldn’t help it.

I asked if I could call her, “Mommy.”

She laughed as if it were nothing and enthusiastically agreed. My head started swimming as I moaned, “Thank you, Mommy!” And, while I didn’t ask to call Bill “Daddy,” Simone was referring to her partner that way and hearing her say it was driving me crazy. At this point, I was in a pile driver position with Bill’s huge cock in my ass and a vibrator on my clit, looking up at Simone’s perfect, MILFy body. I. Came. So. Hard.

I came a lot last night, actually. It was some of the best sex I’ve had outside of my relationship and possibly the best threeway I’ve had ever. It was thrilling, intimate, raunchy, pleasurable–everything that I like. And I can’t wait for more!

*I do not like all accents. I’m picky. For example, I do NOT like English accents. I go back and forth on Irish and Australian ones. I do NOT like Italian or French accents. I think part of the reason I don’t like English, Italian, or French accents is that guys think that talking differently will get them laid. Whenever I get an application from a client who tells me that he’s English or French, I kind of roll my eyes. That said, if an English or French guy shows up and has NOT told me of his nationality, he gets automatic points for not being pretentious. The only accents that I REALLY like are German, Russian, Southern, and Californian. I know it’s odd to fetishize my own accent, but, well, I like it.